Zoo Day

I spent Sunday at the Zoo with SGW. I hadn't been to the Cincinnati Zoo, one of the best in the country, in years other than their lousy Festival of Lights during the holidays last year — at which its always freezing, there are no animals out, not even the polar bears or penguins, and it's always full of Republican families who hate gay people and want to throw them into the purana tank. It wasn't too crowded this time, despite it being Father's Day, another sham Hallmark holiday. There were a lot of hillibillies there, though, which is to be expected when it's a 'parent day' and the zoo is located very closely to hillibilly areas like all of Kentucky and most of Ohio and very nearby southern Indiana. The animals were all out on parade in their holding cells except for the White Tigers which Siegfried & Roy donated to the zoo in the 1890s when Sig and Roy were a middle-aged gay couple. My favorite part, as always, were the Giraffe, whom have their very own ridge now where you can buy a small Chex™-size wafer for $1.00 and stick it on their tongue (pictured), but you cannot pet the Giraffes because "they do not like to be petted."-Zookeeper (pictured). It was also Fuck Day at the zoo because we saw a bunch of animals fucking, mainly in World of the Insect, including two very green turtles who were doing it doggy-style, not that I think animals do it missionary or butterfly (not even butterflies fuck butterfly I bet) or over a lawn chair or the back-seat of a Pontiac Aztek or on a hot summer night on a Slip-N-Slide™ after the kids have gone to bed.